NORWICH City owner Delia Smith has turned down the club’s promotion, insisting the Premier League is too fancy.
Smith said the Championship was a ‘lovely, comforting league, a bit like a Victoria sponge’ and has offered the promotion to Middlesbrough instead.
Smith said: “As well as having our arses continually handed to us – we only came third in a division that includes Rotherham – we’d have to play against all those dreadful people.
“Marouane Fellaini? I’d rather drink my own urine.”
She added: “Also, we’d have to go to big, scary places like Manchester and Liverpool. What if we got really pissed and the bus left without us?
“Perhaps when the top flight once again includes Leeds, Notts Forest and Coventry we might consider it, but at the moment it’s not really our cup of tea.
“And of course, winning promotion then turning it down will absolutely infuriate Ipswich. Bunch of twats.”
