PARENTS who have banned their child from ‘screen time’ do not realise that they are raising a twat.
Tom and Helen Booker do not allow their son to look at phones, tablets, laptops or televisions in the belief that these privations will somehow turn him into a genius.
However, the Bookers are unaware that he is far more likely to become an unbearable arsehole.
Tom Booker said: “We don’t allow Henry to watch anything at all after watching three TED talks about popular culture. We even have special blinkers for when he goes past Dixons’ window.
“This way when his peers are talking about Cars 3 he will be able to tell them about acorns or beetles.”
Professor Henry Brubaker, of the Institute for Studies, said: “Sadly, at this point Henry is a ticking time-bomb. Unless he starts watching Peppa Pig immediately he will be an arse by the time he is five, and an unbearable twat by the age of seven.”
