A WOMAN doing a quick clean will spend 90 per cent of the time clearing large clumps of her own knotted hair.
Lucy Parry is emotionally readying herself for the thankless task of wiping and hoovering up her many shedded hairs, as well as picking them up individually when the sheer volume causes her hoover to break down.
Parry said: “It’s a long and horrible process to eradicate it all. First I’ll tackle the mysterious little nests that appear in the corners of carpeted rooms, as if I live with a flock of tiny, invisible birds.
“Then there are the ones on the walls of the shower room, which defy being removed with a quick swipe of a wet cloth and have to be tortuously plucked off one-by-one.
“And finally there is the horror of the shower trap, which I know is clogged up to f**k with slimy, tangled old hair as it hasn’t drained properly for six months. It’ll be like a John Carpenter film in there, but with an even more hideous monster.”
Parry’s partner Josh Hudson said: “How can a woman constantly lose such a huge volume of hair and not be completely bald?
“They say being part of the patriarchy is good but I’d swap it in a second to not have a thin patch that gets bigger every time I look in the mirror.”
