A FATHER disappointed at an Algarve beach without a single topless sunbather has placed the blame firmly on his son’s prick generation and their phones.
Tom Booker, aged 50, told 14-year-old Dan that before Generation Z came along with their ubiquitous cameras and their social media the sand was a riot of exposed breasts.
He continued: “There wasn’t a boob covered. Didn’t want the tan lines, you see. So it was bikinis off and nary a breath of modesty.
“The 80s and 90s I’d stroll up the beach for an ice-cream I didn’t want and just drink it in. Every age, every size, all there proud and unadorned as nature intended. Magnificent. Made you glad to be alive.
“Even girls you knew wouldn’t think twice. Your Auntie Shona, you know, your mum’s friend who’s not really your auntie, she’d whap them out like it was no big deal and I’d be there, eyes wide, thanking God for my mirrored Oakleys.
“It was a wonderful time, until you dicks ruined it all with your omnipresent cameras and your shared-around-the-world-in-a-second. And I tell you what else, the birds didn’t have all these f**king tattoos.”
Son Dan said: “I can’t support Dad’s kink of wanting to see titties in real life. Breasts should be digital and anonymous.”
