ADVERTS for Febreze ‘fabric refresher’ have caused numerous cases of hepatitis, it has emerged.
The successful ad campaign takes unsuspecting participants off the street, who are blindfolded then encouraged to roll around in vile disused public toilets that have been scented by the product.
Volunteer, Helen Archer said “This outrageously happy guy ran up and bet me to guess his magical secret.
“The next thing I knew, I was blindfolded and face-down on a luxurious, velvet divan, clutching priceless Faberge eggs and burying my face in the sultan’s billowing silk kaftan.
“Someone asked me when i reckoned it’d last been washed and I said “today?”.
“When they took the blindfold off, I was lying on a pile of used condoms, the Faberge eggs were dead rats and the sultan was a drunk old woman with shit up the back of her cardigan.
“Since then I’ve been most unwell.”
The NHS are calling for a nationwide vaccination program to alleviate the strain the adverts are putting on their resources.
Febreze has since withdrawn its latest ad, which featured a Zumba class locked in a dockside storage unit containing an overflowing slop bucket and a severed foot.
