JEREMY Clarkson is now three of the right-wing’s biggest victims of injustice – a motorist, a gentleman farmer and now a pub landlord.
Clarkson, once a mere driver beleaguered by petty laws, is now also a farmer besieged by green regulation and a pub landlord beset by unfair taxes, making him the ultimate martyr for middle-aged men who say ‘For crying out loud!’
He said: “When they’re not imposing needless 20mph zones they’re discovering great-crested newts in my pasture or ordering me to pour good beer down the drain. What happened to common sense, for crying out loud?
“As a driver, a landowner and the proprietor of a hostelry, I represent every decent, honest man in Britain. Yet I find myself struggling to make a profit in two of these fields despite being a complete amateur, and if I can’t surely no-one can.
“Do we not all agree the country should be run for the benefit of Jaguar owners, men with large areas of land who do not want to be taxed on it, and red-faced Little Englanders serving up pints in a country location? Yet unaccountably it is not.
“I am all three, the holy trinity of the right. I suffer for your sins, Mail readers. I ask in return only that you watch me on the telly.”
Roy Hobbs said: “Oh, Jeremy. When I riot it is with you in my heart.”
