A TEENAGER who can access a whole brand new album without getting out of bed doesn’t really appreciate music, her parents have confirmed.
Martin and Helen Bishop say their daughter Lucy doesn’t value the songs she listens to because she has made f**k all effort to go out and get them.
Helen Bishop said: “If I wanted the new East 17 album back in 1994, I had to traipse into town to buy it on cassette, parting with a tenner, which was six sodding week’s worth of pocket money.
“I’d excitedly rush miles home again to put the hissy piece of crap in the tape deck and find out if any of the songs aside from the singles were even vaguely listenable. Which they rarely were.
“Lucy, on the other hand, can just scroll through her phone and listen to three seconds of each track before deciding it’s rubbish and moving onto something else. And she doesn’t even pay for it because it’s on the family plan.
“I feel sorry for her because she doesn’t understand the satisfaction that comes from working hard for something. And also because she never got to experience the sheer majesty of a fully-stocked Woolies Pick ‘n’ Mix section.”
