SABRINA Carpenter has been criticised for her ‘sex show’ performance at the Brits. Here father-of-two Tom Logan, 46, explains why her detractors have got it terribly wrong.
It’s double standards when you consider ‘manspreading’
You can’t get on a bus without some horrible bloke sitting there ‘manspreading’, and yet when Sabrina spreads her charming legs in front of the camera somehow that’s bad. It’s blatant double standards, and well done Sabrina for making a valid feminist point.
It was a moving tribute to Britain’s armed forces
Sabrina’s military-style tunic was reminiscent of the Redcoats and clearly a tribute to the brave troops who defeated Napoleon. Her backing dancers were dressed as Coldstream Guards, a regiment that has served in countless theatres of war including North Africa, the Falklands and Afghanistan. I found it all very respectful and Sabrina strikes me as an intelligent young woman you could sit down a watch a good documentary about Rommel with.
She is a good role model for young people
Idiots claimed Sabrina’s act was inappropriate for a young audience. But have we considered her valuable role in combatting childhood obesity? What better example could there be for our young fatties than slim, toned Sabrina?
Her outfit was actually very practical
Apparently Sabrina’s outfit was too sexual, even ‘slutty’. But if you’re performing a dance routine it makes perfect sense to wear stockings and suspenders that allow your legs to move freely. And her sparkly bra would have been a lifesaver under those hot studio lights. It’s really no different to the builders who did our extension wearing hard hats and fleeces. Although I’d prefer not to see Gary, Liam and Dave kneeling provocatively on all fours presenting their arses.
Sabrina is clearly a talented interior designer
Critics were even complaining about Sabrina posing on a red and pink bed. After spending a tedious Saturday painting the spare room Dulux ‘Almond White’, I’m all in favour of ditching our dull domestic palette of whites and creams in favour of bright colours. If I shared a bedroom with Sabrina I wouldn’t be complaining. Because of the cheerful, uplifting decor, I mean.
It was patriotic
No Briton, including myself, actually likes Rule Britannia, but Sabrina’s medley was at least upbeat, unlike the usual dirges we hear. And I think we’d all prefer to watch a pretty American Anglophile than the wankers at the Proms. Sabrina pretending she was about to fellate a Buckingham Palace sentry was perhaps going a little too far, but it’s a shame we don’t see the same level of commitment to Britain from supposed patriots like Farage and Starmer.
Kids have got to learn about sex at some point
Much has been made of Sabrina appearing before the 9pm watershed, and I will concede that her act can be construed as somewhat sexual. But you’ve got to have the sex talk with your kids at some point, so why not during the Brit Awards? And wanting to have sex with Sabrina Carpenter is more relatable than ‘the birds and the bees’, although my wife got strangely annoyed again for some reason.
