Lifestyle

TELEPHONE calls are rarely made by anyone except annoying twerps these days, and for good reason. Here’s why.

ACROSS the country, adults are realising that once given more than four days off in a row they run out of things to do and visit garden centres.

A MOTHER of three is trying to set the right cover charge for tomorrow’s Christmas dinner with her family.

A MILLENNIAL unable to afford a car or house deposit is barely able to cover the cost of his all-over ink, he has confirmed.

THE most wonderful time of the year is upon us, and you’ll be spending it trapped in a room with a person you abhor. Who is your Yuletide nemesis?

DECIDED to f**k up everyone else’s Christmas by having a wedding? You probably think these other things are a great idea too.

WOMEN are fully aware there are sprigs of mistletoe strategically placed over doorways and are deliberately disregarding them, it has emerged.

YOUNG thrill-seeking drinkers, bored with gentrified gastropubs, are seeking out old-fashioned drinkeries that serve pints flavoured with intimidation and danger.

A POPULAR high street wargaming store has announced that the beauty pageant it was due to hold today has been cancelled.