Health

MEDICAL research has discovered that getting a stitch while running is a clinical indication the entire practice is wrong and you should stop exercising immediately.

A WOMAN who nipped into Tesco to pick up a few bits has returned home with eight different contagious illnesses, she has confirmed.

HAVE you made the unwise decision to clean your own oven, based purely on it being unacceptably filthy? These are the stages of your unfolding regret.

COUNCILS across England considering moving refuse collections to once every four weeks have been asked to do the exact opposite.

CARING for your well-being is important and even more than that, employers cannot stop you. Make a mockery of mental health with these.

A WOMAN slipping into her winter parka for the first time since March has discovered the seasonal melancholy she left in it and has been without ever since.

TRAVELLING to Turkey for cosmetic surgery which goes horribly wrong is now a rite of passage for Britons. What misjudged operation are you choosing?

FEELING impotent, sad and powerless is normal for Britons, but nonetheless it hurts to see American voters elect a convict and aspiring dictator. This is what you’ll go through.

SMOKING will soon be banned outside hospitals when within living memory it was every Englishman’s right to have an NHS ashtray. And it was fine in all these locations.