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One Woman's Week: Sister Act
By Karen Fenessey
ANYONE who knows me will be able to tell you that I am one of the most inclusive and sympathetic women you will ever meet. This is why, without any prompts, I go to great lengths to help my down-and-out sister who, if I must speak frankly, is a fat cow.
Getting Drunk And Urinating On Your Boss's Desk Is Not Your Fault, Say Experts
PEOPLE who get drunk and then empty their bladder on and around their boss's workspace are the victims of 21st century society, a major study has revealed.
Britain Hit By Obscenity Epidemic
BRITAIN is in the middle of an obscenity epidemic with most people expected to be foul-mouthed ‘fuckers’ by 2050, according to latest government estimates.
Pub Lunches Cost £20 But Still Taste Of Dung And Sweat, Says Report
THE cost of the traditional British pub lunch has soared to £20 even though the basic ingredients of cow pats and chef sweat have remained the same, a major industry survey has revealed.
Most BBC News Now About The BBC
THE majority of the news output from the BBC is now about the BBC, according to a new BBC report.
Booker Prize Goes To Thrilling Page-Turner About The Intangible Nature Of Loss
ANNE Enright has won Britain's most prestigious literary award for her latest rollercoaster thrill-ride of a novel about some Irish people having a big talk about this and that.
Men Should Have Sex Every Day, Say Men
MEN should have sex every day, according to the latest scientific research by men.
Lib Dems Begin Search For Dynamic Young Loser
THE Liberal Democrats will today attempt to regain the political initiative as they begin their search for an exciting young loser to lead them into the next election.