Search Results for:
Why are all the pubs closing? ask people who never go to the pub
MILLIONS of people across Britain who never go to the pub have been asking why all the pubs were closing down.
Someone Claiming To Be Me Has Been Saying It’s All Your Fault, Brown Tells America
GORDON Brown yesterday told America that someone has been going around blaming them for the global economic collapse and using his name.
Britney May As Well Be A Corpse Puppet, Say Fans
BRITNEY Spears kicked off her first major tour in five years with a larynx-free performance that was no better than a dancing corpse puppet, angry fans said last night.
Injecting Foul Smelling Gas Directly Into Your Penis Will Improve Sex Life, Say Experts
INJECTING the foul stench of rotten eggs directly into your flaccid penis will soon replace Viagra as the world's leading treatment for erectile dysfunction, scientists claimed last night.
Obama Obviously Has A New Watch, Says Brown
PRESIDENT Obama clearly has a new watch and is fascinated with it, Gordon Brown revealed last night.
My Big Gap Year
Dispatches from Poppy Spalding
WEDNESDAY: ULAN BATOR
THERE comes a point in every backpacker's journey where they just lose the plot and do something totally outrageous. For me, this happened in the airport last week when I just said 'To Hell with everything!' and jumped on a flight to the renowned cannibal stomping ground of Mongolia!
Make Goodwin Give Back His Pension, Brown Tells Obama
GORDON Brown will today ask Barak Obama to make that horrid Fred Goodwin give his pension back.
Scientists To Continue Stem-Cell Research Purely To Annoy Christians
LEADING scientists last night rejected a new 'ethical' stem cell technique insisting it would do nothing to annoy fundamentalist Christians.