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Honda Jazz Filled With Scorpions
CAR giant Honda last night confirmed that its Jazz supermini hatchback is full of deadly scorpions.
Labour Bottles The Taste Of Failure
THE Labour Party has combined the essence of disappointment, inertia and broken promises in a unique sauce that voters can add to their food.
Church Plans Supergay Parade Float
THE Archbishop of Canterbury has underlined the Church of England's support for tolerance and diversity with plans for a 'supergay' parade float.
Your Problems Solved, With Holly Harper
Dear Holly,
The other day, my girlfriend was trying on an outfit and she asked my opinion. I said that she looked nice, at which point she got all uppity and said she didn't believe me and she wished that I would just be honest with her for once. So I told her the truth: that she looked like Les Dawson in a boob tube...
Guest Blog: Fearne Cotton
OH-my-God, I'm like, sooooooo busy at the moment - I haven't had any time to be down in the dumps, unlike the crowd of people I saw today standing at a bus stop in the rain. I told my driver to slow down and as he did, I poked my head out of the window and hollered, "Cheer up guys - it might never happen!" It doesn't matter how mega-stressed you're feeling, you've still got to find time for your fans...
America Divided Over Waterboarding Of Children
THE arrest of a US soldier accused of sticking his daughter's head in a sink has sparked a national debate over when it is acceptable to water-board a child.
Yes, Ethel Austin Was Still Going, Say Administrators
ADMINISTRATORS were last night called in to retail chain Ethel Austin, as thousands insisted it definitely went out of business no later than 1961.
Brangelina split foretold in Book Of Isiah
PASSAGES in the Old Testament predicted the split between Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie, according to a leading academic.