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Aliens A Bit Like Lily Allen, Say Experts
EXTRA-TERRESTRIALS could already be bombarding the Earth with short bursts of self-promoting drivel, it was claimed last night.
Griffin Is First Nazi Banned From Palace Since Edward Viii
NICK Griffin last night became the first Nazi to be told he was not welcome at Buckingham Palace since King Edward VIII in 1936.
BP Photoshopped Image Of Pelican Giving The Thumbs-Up
OIL giant BP has been accused of manipulating an image of a Gulf of Mexico pelican to show the bird giving the 'thumbs-up'.
Diana In Heaven
Shakespeare’s been teaching me how to play darts and I'm entered into a
tournament next week. Darts is a bit different up here - this is Heaven
so it's obviously well fucking better.
Flying Donkey Stunt 'Not Cruel Enough' For Children
A STUNT involving a terrified parachuting donkey left children disappointed by the lack of death, it emerged last night.
Hodgson Mistakes Cole For Grandson
LIVERPOOL boss Roy Hodgson has unsettled new signing Joe Cole by repeatedly asking whether he's Sylvia or Enid's lad.
Stonehenge May Have Been A Henge Showroom, Say Experts
THE discovery of a second henge at Stonehenge has led to claims that the site may have been a showroom for henges.
World War II 'Illegal', Says Cameron
DAVID Cameron was facing the wrath of veterans' groups last night after claiming the Second World War was illegal.