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Poofter spat in my macaroni, claims angry old woman

ONE of them poofters spat in my macaroni cheese last night, Mrs Phillips in room seven has claimed.

Don't say she was constantly drunk, BBC told Sissons

BBC newsreader Peter Sissons was told not to mention that the Queen Mother was usually hammered.

Coe admits links to ICF

SEBASTIAN Coe has revealed he was once a leading member of West Ham's notorious Inter City Firm.

BBC launches inquiry into what working class people like

THE BBC has ordered a multi-million pound investigation into the tastes of the poor.

Offside rule incredibly straightforward

THE offside rule is so simple even a woman can easily understand it, experts have confirmed.

Coulson 'knew he was going to resign' claims Guardian

FORMER Number 10 press chief Andy Coulson must have known about his own resignation, the Guardian claimed today.

What gives? asks Tony the Prick

GOOMBA sleazeball Tony 'the Prick' Blair was being questioned today about his role in the Iraq war scamola.

Government to deploy riot scouts

ARMED Scouts with kevlar woggles are the future of riot control, the government has confirmed.