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Stylish Masturbator, with Dermot Jaye

The modern world has forgotten that masturbation can be an aspirational activity.

RBS collapse 'not caused by the ghost of a dog'

THE failure of the Royal Bank of Scotland was caused by bad decisions rather than the ghost of a Border collie, it has emerged.

Cloning a mammoth is a shit idea, say experts

PLANS to clone a woolly mammoth have been dismissed as incredibly stupid and shit.

Arsenal to unveil statue of man checking his texts

THE next statue to be unveiled outside the Emirates Stadim will be of someone looking really bored.

Everyone still pretending they know what they're talking about

THREE days after the exploding Euro-summit, everyone is still pretending that they know what is going to happen.

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Are you supposed to breast feed the Son of God?