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Volleyball sold out
OLYMPIC organisers have pleaded with the public to buy tickets for events not based on bikinis or hotpants.
Creeping sense of oblivion up 32%
BRITAIN'S general feeling that all is lost has jumped by almost a third in the last quarter.
Power Thinking, with Dr Morris O'Connor
I play the sax and vibe in on vocals in a four piece called Chateau.
BBC tells D:Ream keyboard player to shove it
PRODUCERS of Professor Brian Cox's Blimey! Planets, Eh? have told him to keep his opinions on music to himself.
There's no shortage of shit jobs, minister tells unemployed
THOUSANDS of jobs involving raw meat and extreme temperatures are there for the taking, the government has claimed.
Ferdinand not sleazy enough to captain England
RIO Ferdinand does not have the commanding sleaze of a world class sexual predator needed to captain England, Fabio Capello has claimed.
Hackman to star in Midsomer Burning
GENE Hackman is to reprise his role as a tough FBI man in the upcoming racist drama Midsomer Burning.
Nuclear disasters not just caused by communism
NUCLEAR disasters can be caused by things other than lazy, inefficient communists, it has emerged.