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Picnics even shitter than barbecues

TRANSPORTING food into a field to eat it is a worthless endeavour, it has been confirmed.      

Indians allowed into pavilion bar

ENGLAND have rewarded India's act of noble savagery by admitting them to the Trent Bridge bar to drink amongst gentlemen.

Last-minute US deal prevents certain death of everybody in world

THE violent death of every human being was prevented last night after some American politicians agreed to get some more money.

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Cameltoe Park: The Inappropriate Wildlife Sanctuary

BSkyB changes logo to middle finger

BSKYB is to change its corporate logo to a manicured hand flipping off the whole world.

Hollywood must allow theft of piece of shit films

FILMS without merit can now be downloaded without fear of prosecution, it has been confirmed.

Bedside vigil for ball victim Hernandez

A DEVASTATED Manchester United squad have begun a round the clock vigil at bedside of team mate, Javier Hernandez after a football hit his little face.

End of internet anonymity to make web even more depressing

INTERNET users will be forced to reveal details of their pathetic lives in a new drive to stop them being ghastly.