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Power Thinking, with Dr Morris O'Connor

I don’t think anyone other than a woman who was born into poverty would do some of the things I request in bed.

Your problems solved, with Holly Harper

'What the fuck do you think you're doing you smelly little weirdo?'.

Your astrological week ahead, with Psychic Bob

Sagittarius (22 NOV-21 DEC)
My momma always said life was like a box of chocolates. Mind you, she also said that One Direction were just like the Velvet Underground.

Leaked climate emails force carbon dioxide to resign

CARBON dioxide has resigned from being a gas, it has been confirmed.

Millions trying to wash away the awfulness

SHOWERS are taking twice as long as 20 years ago as people desperately try to scrub off the 21st century, say researchers.

Even darker version of internet 'sounds delightful'

THE notion of a so-called 'darknet' has confounded those who were sure the normal internet represented the very depths of human depravity.

Andrew Lansley to watch you while you sleep

HEALTH secretary Andrew Lansley is to sit next to hospital patients, looking at them while they sleep.

Plan to pay off deficit with bits of old soap 'not working'

THE government's plan to wipe out Britain's deficit using little bits of discarded soap is not going well, David Cameron has revealed.