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Neville checks his phone is working

GARY Neville has spent the last 24 hours obsessively calling his voicemail and making sure his phone has full bars.


Tolkien denied Nobel Prize 'because he wrote about Hobbits'

JRR Tolkien was rejected by the Nobel Prize committee because he wrote about hobbits, dwarves and orcs, it has emerged.

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Britain has a motorway speed limit, claims minister

TRANSPORT Secretary Justine Greening believes there is currently some sort of legal limit to how fast Britons can go on the motorway, it has emerged.

Nominations pour in for assisted suicide

DOZENS of popular candidates have emerged for the first round of semi-voluntary lethal injections.

Missing cat returns with no memory of lost days

A CAT that has returned to its owners after spending a week missing cannot recall where it has been.

Slight amendments made to New Year's resolution to quit smoking

SMOKERS who officially gave up on New Year's Day have clarified what 'giving up' actually means.