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Google kicks Queen in the face

GOOGLE has kicked the Queen squarely in the teeth, it has been confirmed.

Chelsea-Man U 'a great advert for atheism'

SUPPORTERS of every other team in the country say the 3-3 match at Stamford Bridge yesterday was definitive proof of a godless universe.

Snow continues to be the same

THIS year's snow is the same as last year's, it has been confirmed.

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Panic as Britain Huhneless

BRITAIN is in the hands of a Huhneless government.

Scottish expedition discovers then deep-fries massive prawn

MARINE biologists from Scotland have discovered, deep-fried and eaten the world's biggest prawn.

Capello advised not to select anybody

FABIO Capello has been asked to submit an empty team sheet for Euro 2012 to avoid selecting gits.