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Bafta glory for Optimus Prime

MASSIVE CGI robot Optimus Prime was the big winner at last night's Baftas, picking up Best Male Actor and Best Massive CGI Robot.

Greece 'stuck between a rock and actually paying tax'

GREECE could be forced to set up some kind of tax system, the country's prime minster has admitted.

Call for consensus on how to destroy the NHS

MPs must stop using the National Health Service as a political football so that it can be destroyed once and for all, it has been claimed.

Suarez to sing 'I Will Always Love You' to Patrice Evra

THE Football Association has ordered Luis Suarez to sing I Will Always Love You to Manchester United's Patrice Evra on Valentine's Day.

Steiner schools blamed for this hat

THE Waldorf-Steiner education system is responsible for a piece of headgear that offends all aesthetic sensibilities, it has been claimed.

Bikes and cars fundamentally incompatible

THE combination of pedal-based transport and motor vehicles on roads is utterly insane, it has been confirmed.

Nick Griffin tipped as England manager

PUNDITS have predicted Nick Griffin will be the next England manager on the basis everyone already hates him anyway.